Reflection of a Smile

I was taught to smile at everyone. You never know what kind of day they are having, what they are going through, or the impact a simple smile could have.

I still smile at almost everyone. If I can make even a small difference that way, it’s worth it.

Looking in the mirror today, tired, I smiled at myself. Then realized, I don’t remember the last time I genuinely smiled at me; not a pose for a picture, not customer service, not a reaction to someone or something else but instead extending that kindness inward.

Self love, worth, and identity are lifelong struggles for a lot of people on varying levels, whether it’s body issues, awkwardness, trauma or circumstances. I don’t have everyday solid advice, since humans are very complex with varying situations.

But, can you do me a favor, dear friends and strangers? Can you smile at yourself like you would a stranger, friend, or family member? Please be kind to yourselves.

The robbed that smiles, steals something from the thief.

William Shakespeare

A day later

Last night, I got home from work, exhausted and unmotivated. I was fully set to lay on my bed, skip dinner, and hide from the mess that is my apartment. Thankfully, a couple of calls with people got me moving.

While I still only managed a bowl of Cream of Wheat for dinner, it counts as eating right? Starting around 9pm, the cleaning bug bit and my kitchen, clean clothes, and a few other things are now taken care of.

When do you get inspiration? Mine shows up at some of the worst times for my schedules of work, sleep, and responsibilities. I worked at 7:30am this morning and ended up getting to sleep around 11pm. Do any of you have tips for getting the most out of ill-timed inspiration, when your to-do lists is seemingly endless and your energy is regularly low after working?

I’ve been dealing with some health difficulties on top of the normal stresses and “excessive heat” advisories of the past week so thank you for reading my short update, a day after I wrote it.

Wishing you health and inspiration this week, friends and strangers.

This day of “Everyday”

Hello friends and strangers,

Hopefully you are well. I write this after what I could normally consider a dragging, hectic Monday at work. A valued co-worker put in her notice of resignation, another is miserable with a cough and sniffles, and I didn’t accomplish much productivity over my weekend.

I can’t help but be happy though, content, somehow calm. I’ve got my door open so the wind can blow. All manner of birds can be heard, as well as the simmering of a vegetable broth on the stove. Clove is grooming herself, just out of reach on the rug and I have baked a very healthy and visually pleasing dinner. Just kidding, it’s frozen mini corn dogs but they are yummy.

Since not much productivity happened over my weekend, I came home to a very messy apartment: Clean clothes strewn everywhere, trash desperately needing handling, and a kitchen full of dirty dishes. I powered through them immediately upon getting home, a rare occurrence that normally drains me. Yet, I feel full emotionally. I’m almost afraid to admit it, that it won’t be true if I do. Is this purely gratitude? I honestly don’t remember the last day of “regular” life that I was this wholly happy for it to be mine.

I have much to be grateful for and I just felt the need to share how thankful I am that I can actually feel it today instead of just knowing it. Hopefully you are able to escape the blur of time passing. Have a wonderful evening of this day, of your everyday.

From the kitchen rug

Some days it’s just not practical to try to think of everything as wonderful and fantastical. Some days require oneself to see the day for what it is and simply make the best of it.

Today is not a bad day. There is sunlight streaming through my window and I am afforded some peace and quiet, apart from my own head trying to wind me up. My rabbit, Clove is out and doesn’t feel the need to move around the apartment much. Instead, she is enjoying sitting on the rug in the kitchen and occasionally visiting me to see if I will share the apple I have just sliced.

It’s been a long week. I can’t quite explain it but I feel drained, drowsy and just a bit broken. That’s the truth. Learning to recognize my own emotions and struggles, while also finding the beauty and positivity in my days is a constant learning experience. I post the beautiful things I look for and find, to increase my thankfulness and appreciation for what I have. I don’t want anyone to be mislead by thinking that my pictures, my highlight reel, is all there is to my life. Life is deep. There is always more to the story than you can see.

Enjoy this beautiful day strangers and friends. There is only one of it.